Have you experienced the dark night of the soul? Have you been in a place in your life that you felt completely stuck with no light at the end of the tunnel? The dark night of the soul can manifest in many different ways – as a mid-life crisis, as a relationship crisis, as losing a dear one, as losing your job or financial security. Or can be a mixture of things, the perfect storm of unfortunate events or zemblanity (yes, this is a real word, check it out in the dictionary, it is the antonym of serendipity).
I have been there too. It feels dark, it feels that you have no control, and the worst of all is that you don’t know how long you will be there. This total sense of losing control over the circumstances is the most frightening part. So we try to push more, we try to take control, we try to assert ourselves, but we get stuck even more in the spiderweb of confusion.
So one day as I was sitting in my office very frustrated with my life and especially with where my career was going the answer suddenly hit me. After several long months of frustration, anger, denial, and anxiety, I accumulated the critical thought mass that presented me with the answer. During challenging and trying times when you are struggling to find the path in the fog of confusion, the most energy efficient way to move forward in your life is to follow the path with “No Resistance”.
When the troubles come in your life acknowledge them, reserve the right to be frustrated, angry and disappointed, but do continue with your daily responsibilities and routines. You will feel sad, confused and discouraged at times, but it will get better, I guarantee you. When you live with a “no resistance” attitude, you will have more time to reflect on the hints that the Universe is giving you and less time on overthinking your drama. The wisdom will come through the voices of your friends, through random (or are they?) happenstances, or through the comments of the friendly neighborhood cashier in your grocery store.
The truth will find you if you are ready to listen and a solution will be presented to you. No resistance! Make no mistake however, no resistance does not mean to sit idle and do nothing. Apply to that job, take your kids to the park, fix that broken tail light, reach out for help. If you find that a certain door is closed – stop pushing, and stop resisting the rejection, delays or disappointments due to the lack of immediate results. You are not meant to enter through that door. Sometimes closed doors are the greatest blessing in life. When one door closes another opens, you just need to recognize that it is wide open and decide to step on the path it will eventually lead you to.
It is hard to realize it in the heat of the moment, when you are immersed in frustration with all the blockers that present themselves to you. It is very likely that you will go into a “victim mode”, you blame the circumstances, you blame yourself, you blame your environment, you blame the people who “seemingly” control the situation. There is no one to blame, stop pushing and see where your boat will go.
Pay attention to the hints that life is giving you, the Universe has plans for you. And these plans are always better than the plans your ego is cooking up! Your path to salvation is the path with no resistance.